Wherever you go, there you are.

A new country can change your surroundings. But only you can change yourself.

 If you read my last post, Starting Over, you'll know that I argued we don't have to spend our lives living by assumptions that other people have handed to us. Sometimes we really can choose a different path.

This article is the first in a short series about one particular way of starting over: moving abroad.

Having now lived in Britain, Germany and Spain, I've learned that changing countries can be one of life's greatest adventures. It can broaden our horizons, introduce us to wonderful people and force us to grow in ways we never imagined.

But it also taught me one of the most important lessons I've ever learned.

Changing countries is much easier than changing yourself.

When my husband and I finally decided to leave Germany after almost sixteen years and begin a new chapter of our lives in Spain, it felt like the culmination of months of planning.

The EasyJet flight landed in Málaga exactly on time.

The sun was shining.

The future felt full of promise.

We walked into baggage reclaim smiling, chatting excitedly about our new life.

Then the carousel stopped.

Everyone else had collected their luggage.

Mine hadn't arrived.

At first I wasn't too worried.

"It's probably coming on the next trolley," I said.

Ten minutes passed.

Then twenty.

Then thirty.

Soon I found myself pacing around the baggage hall, trying unsuccessfully to find someone who could tell me where my suitcase was.

My thoughts began racing.

What if it's been lost?

My important documents are in there.

We'll miss the train.

It'll be too late to eat.

This is a disaster.

Within an hour, my dream move to Spain had somehow become a nightmare — and we hadn't even left the airport.

Then my husband quietly took hold of my arm.

He looked me straight in the eyes.

"You know what this proves?" he asked.

I looked at him blankly.

"You've packed the one piece of luggage you'll never be able to leave behind: YOURSELF."

For a moment I wasn't quite sure what he meant.

Then he smiled.

"Just look how stressed you are. Exactly the same as you were in Berlin. Spain isn't going to change that. But you can decide how you want to respond from now on."

I wish I could tell you that I immediately became calm and philosophical.

I didn't.

But his words have stayed with me ever since.

Because they contain a truth that applies not only to moving abroad, but to almost every fresh start we make in life.

Wherever you go, there you are.

SIMPLY. BETTER. LIVING.

"The longest journey you will ever take is the eighteen inches from your head to your heart."  — Native American proverb